Many of us have learned to cope with our loneliness by doing whatever we can not to have to feel it. We use relationships to stave off the loneliness. We stay in unhealthy, toxic, even abusive relationships, sometimes because we’re afraid of being alone. We try to fill the silence so we don’t have to…
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A good recovery plan must be multifaceted and address all the important areas of your life. You have to address the psychological aspects of addiction as well as any co-occurring conditions that may influence your substance use. You have to repair your relationships and build a strong social support system. You need to find meaning…
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When we look back at our childhoods, many of us realize that our addictive patterns began when we were very young. The emotional responses, thought patterns and behaviors that are part of our addictions may have developed early on when were children. Sometimes we learn from our families and caregivers that it is better…
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We usually think of boredom as a harmless thing, but it can actually be a trigger for our addictive behaviors and can be a factor in whether or not we relapse. A challenge for many of us is that we find ourselves bored without the substances, relationships and behaviors we’ve grown to be dependent on…
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One of the most powerful trauma healing methods we can use in our recovery is learning to work with our inner child. As adults, we still have our inner child, or our childhood self, within us. All of the pain we experienced when we were younger is still part of us, and to heal and…
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When we turn to addictive substances, relationships and behaviors, it is often because we are trying to drown out the voices of our inner demons. They play off of our deepest fears, of inadequacy, inferiority, abandonment, loss, rejection. They tell us that we’re not good enough, that we aren’t deserving of love, that we are…
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The teenage years are a turbulent time. Teens face pressure to succeed in school and get into good colleges. They have to negotiate a shifting social life and dating. They may have to work or deal with family issues on top of all that. It’s a time of change, uncertainty, and insecurity. According to the…
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Our addictions and mental health issues can cause us to create deep rifts in our relationships. When we are using and/or depressed, we can treat the people around us in ways we might not otherwise. We might be consumed with anger, bitterness and resentment that we unleash on the people around us. We might be…
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Our addictions are often fueled by our escapism and avoidance. What many of us are trying to escape and avoid, and distract ourselves from, is the pain of our past. We will do anything to avoid having to face it. It can be terrifying look at the painful things we’ve been through – the hurt…
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One of the best things we can do for ourselves in recovery is create a relapse prevention plan – a plan for how we will respond to addictive urges when they hit. Very often when we’re not prepared for urges, our instinct is to respond to them the way we always did, by using. Our…
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